Shared parenting, often referred to as shared custody, joint custody, or shared care, involves the parents playing an important role in their child’s life, providing them with love and supervision following separation. It does not mean assigning fixed amounts of time to each parent or that a child’s time must be divided 50:50 with each parent; it is more about the parents being active contributors in the decision-making processes regarding their child(ren). This is especially the case where the percentage of time spent with the child(ren) by the non-resident parent is so low that it cannot be said that parenting is shared or that the non-resident parent can be effective in any decision-making regarding their child.
Shared parenting refers to the long-term parenting plan rather than just a single point in a child’s life, and this plan should be modified throughout a child’s life to effectively take into consideration the changing emotional, academic, and physical needs as a child grows and progresses. Shared parenting should be flexible and take a child-centred approach, meaning that the child’s well-being and needs are central to any decisions made.
The aims of shared parenting include:
-The children feel they have two involved parents.
-One parent cannot control or lead the lives of the children or the non-resident parent via the children at the expense of the other.
-The children have contact with either parent when required, and they are both seen as equivalent in the eyes of the child.
-The kids are able to share rounded, holistic time with both parents, i.e., routine and leisure time.
-Both parents are seen as equal by all, including the rule, education, friends, etc.
-That one parent is not omitted from any part of the child’s life due to parenting time, etc.
-That the kid is not excluded from any part of the non-resident parent’s life due to parenting time, etc.
-Parental alienation can be negated by spending enough time with both parents.
-That the parents are able to settle changes of opinion on parenting issues that may be unveiled in the future.
-The parents agree to accept each other’s parenting styles.
These norms will obviously be different for each family, dependent upon the consideration, discussion, and conciliation of individual needs, situations, and wishes of both the parents and children.
Instances of shared parenting
Weekend interaction begins on Friday with the collection from school and continues until Monday morning, when they are returned to school. This enhances parenting time, allows communication with the school, allows the non-resident parent to be a part of the child’s routine, and limits contact between the parents if there is tension. Mid-week contact, again picking the child up from school and preferably staying overnight.
Contact for half the holidays must mean half the time the child has off school and should include school training days, bank holidays, etc.
Special occasions such as Christmas and birthdays, for example, are shared equally in examples where the parents cannot be together and that children are allowed to spend time with the other parent on days that are special to that parent in specific, i.e., parents and close relatives’ birthdays, Mother’s and Father’s days, etc.
If a parent is present and free to care for the child, after-school clubs, creche, and so on should not be used. Adequate time is given for the child to see relatives from both sides of the family.
Taking the child or children to any appointments relating to health
Creating a shared parenting plan
There are many approaches to resolution that can help parties agree on an appropriate shared parenting plan for their child or children. They can include solicitor negotiation, parties’ discussions, litigation, and mediation for families.
