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Co-Parenting: How Can I Get to Spend Time With My Child After Separating From My Spouse?

co-parenting, co-parenting plan, A recently divorced father playing blocks with his son on the floor of their living room

Co-Parenting Plan

When divorce occurs, there are many practical considerations to resolve. Usually, both parents will want to spend time with their children and contribute to their upbringing, so a balanced and fair arrangement is in everyone’s best interest – including that of the child.

What To Consider

What things do you need to consider when negotiating a co-parenting arrangement and how can you make it a success that eases your children’s anxiety during this challenging time?

  • The age of the children: the needs of children vary according to their age. Older children, for example, often need longer periods of focused time, whereas younger offspring may be happier with a ‘little and often’ arrangement.
  • Work commitments: it is more important than ever that both parents continue to earn a healthy income, as you will not be able to lean on each other as much for financial support after the divorce. If one of you works unpredictable shifts, there will need to be some leeway to allow changes to the routine of seeing the children.
  • Travel time: if you or your ex-partner have moved out of the local area, you will need to factor in travel time. Living an hour apart presents more challenges than living a few minutes apart.
  • Accommodation: after divorce, many children live predominantly with one parent, so you will need to consider where they will meet the other parent and whether their new home can accommodate longer stays, such as weekends and overnights.
  • Parental relationship: you may have divorced but, ideally, you will need to be able to cooperate on good terms to ensure as much continuity for the children as possible.  How well you communicate with your former spouse will determine what sort of relationship you can maintain with your children.

The Importance Of A Co-Parenting Plan

In the first days after a separation or divorce is finalised, when there are many things to consider, many parents opt for a go-with-the-flow arrangement, with flexible, short-notice activities. This can work well, but only if relations between the parents remain strong and amicable, and there is high-quality communication between both parties.

Effective co-parenting requires regular communication, cooperation, and understanding from both parents. Establishing boundaries and expectations from the outset can simplify the situation, especially if relations sour in future. This will help to avoid situations where children are unsure when they will see one parent, which could induce anxiety and distress. For these reasons, a mutually agreed co-parenting plan can be invaluable.

Making A Co-Parenting Plan Legally Binding

A parenting or co-parenting plan, drawn up by child arrangements solicitors, is the basis for a consent order which will explicitly state:

  • Where the child/children will live.
  • When they will spend time with each parent.
  • What types of other contact may take place, such as phone/video calls.

To make an agreement legally binding, a court will need to approve the agreement and make a consent order.

Contact Astle Paterson For More Information

At Astle Paterson, our divorce and family solicitors in Burton on Trent can help you to reach an agreement to allow both parents to spend quality time with their children.

To find out more, please book an appointment with our team of trusted solicitors today.

Request A Consultaiton

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